“I’m Going to Write a Book.”

…Is what I said four years ago. To my family, friends, random acquaintances and pretty much anyone who’d listen.

That’s a sentence that sounds like it should be followed by something inspiring. Something like, ‘And then I really did write it. And then I got an agent…and a publishing deal…and now Warner Bros. wants to buy the movie rights for 8 million dollars, so I can finally afford avocados. And an actual pet dragon, probably.’

But that would be a lie. Instead I have to write the truth, which goes something like this:

I didn’t write a book.

Instead I spent a year trying to write one, which definitely isn’t the same thing. And then I started doing everything that wasn’t writing. Freelance illustration, graphic design, copy editing. Not because I didn’t want to write —I did— but because I was scared. Scared of failing again. Scared that I’d just be wasting more time, that I’d just disappoint myself even more than before.

But the thing is, I can’t stop thinking of my stories. They’re bouncing around in my head 24-7, and the thought of them never coming into being makes me utterly depressed. So although I’m still freelancing during the day, I’ve decided to start writing again at night. Only this time I’m posting about my progress here, to keep myself accountable.

I’m also posting about the things that inspire me, books that I love and everything and anything I learn during the drafting process. So if you’re an aspiring author yourself, a reader or someone who just wants to follow along, feel free to say hi in in the comments. And just for fun, share a little something about yourself. I’ll start.

Hi, my name’s Halley.

And I really want that pet dragon.